What women want!! No, not Applicable!!

What women want! “We are men. We are different. We have only one word for soap. We do not own candles. We have never seen anything of any value in a craft shop. We do not own magazines fill of pictures of celebrities with all their clothes on. When we have conversations, we actually take it in turns to talk!”
It was just a CONTROVERSIAL status update on my Facebook profile long back! 
Anyway I was supposed to write on “what women want” ..  I have just spent 26 years on this earth, how can I know/write that!! ;) Though I managed to pen down some observations. Ladies, excuse me for the eye on details! :P
  1. Don't make us guess.
  2. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
  3. Don't feel compelled to tell us how all the people in your stories are related to one another; we're just nodding, waiting for the punchline.
  4. Sometimes he's not thinking about you. Live with it.
  5. Get rid of your cat. And no, it's not different - it's just like every other cat.
  6. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
  7. Never buy a "new" brand of jeans/beer because it was on sale.
  8. Crying is like blackmail: Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
  9. The quarterback who just got pummelled isn't trying to be brave. He's just not crying. Big difference!
  10. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers.
  11. If we're in the backyard and the TV in the den is on, that doesn't mean we're not watching it.
  12. Foreign language films are best left to foreigners.
  13. Don't cut your own hair. Ever.
  14. Please don't drive when you're not driving.
  15. Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
  16. When the waiter asks if everything's OK, a simple "yes" is fine.
  17. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
  18. Whenever possible, please try to say whatever you have to say during commercials.
  19. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
  20. Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
In spite of whatever crap I said, I respect every woman out there, and I am blessed with some beautiful women in my life, my mother, my sisters, my friends .. but no, not my ex girlfriend(s)! :P

DISCLAIMER: Ohh, never mind! :P

My Father Taught Me! :)

Those qualities my father has given me
reach beyond just love and stability.

He made me learn how to wield a hammer,
- a tool which is not just used for hitting nails.

He made me learn how to hold a pen,
- a prized-weapon much safer with an eye on detail.

He made me learn how to treat my people,
- be it man, woman or animal.
He made me learn how to help others,
- more so when one might fail.

He made me learn how to never give up,
- a strength that strengthens the idea of prevail.

He made me learn how to be myself,
- a person that no one else could ever avail.

..many more are the qualities, my father gave me,
and they made me what I am today. Thank you Papa!