Not so nice to be nice!

Show me your hand if you've ever been in a relationship. Now lower your hand if that relationship wasn't with another person. Now lower your hand if you are currently in a relationship that has lasted more than 3 years. If your hand is still up, you probably suck at being in a relationship. If it's not up, you may suck at it anyway. So here goes a narration by one of my friend, who did a WEIRD EXPERIMENT with relationships! Do read through and please don’t blame me for the language, it’s his outburst against few things!

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I have reached a firm conclusion.  It's both important and guaranteed true.  In fact, I'm fairly certain I've stumbled across one of the basic tenets of life, and that is that girls are full of bullshit.  I wouldn't make this claim if I didn't have unrefutable evidence to back up my assertion.  Luckily, I do.  This all stems from the common girl comment "I wish I could just find a nice guy for once".  BULLSHIT.

So, without further ado, I give you my proof, in 3 point essay form -

1) Anyone who knows me, knows I'm (usually) NOT that nice guy.  But I decided last week to give it a go and see what happened.  So, for the past 10 days or so, I've been nice, kind, gentlemanly, and generally thoughtful to others.  Also for the last 10 days, I've been blown off, used, exploited, probably laughed at, and generally shat on at a frequency of at least 5 times a day.  Before I tried the nice guy experiment, I'm fairly certain those things hadn't happened to me 5 times in the last 5 YEARS.

Conclusion - girls are evil and "nice guys" just serve as a way to boost their fragile egos.

2) During this experiment, two times I got so drunk I reverted to my previous, natural state.  This ended with me being sexually assaulted (I was even such an asshole I walked off) and soon after collecting a phone number from a different girl.  For those 2 hours or less, I was free.  Last night I got trashed, reverted to previous, natural state, and even though I was screwed over with one out-of-my-control circumstance, I still talked to a stripper for a while and had a girl yell at me as I walked down the street and invite me to drink beer with her.  Total count:  Asshole Me - 3 in 36 hours, Nice Guy Me - negative 13 or so.

Conclusion - Girls are evil and "nice guys" just serve as a way to recover from the deep dickin' that they received from the asshole guy the night before.

3) I cannot even begin to count the amount of "I'm washing dishes, I'll call you right back!" type comments, followed by nothing further, that I experienced this week.  My best friend, naturally good guy to the end, experienced almost as many.  We talked.  He experiences this on a regular basis.  I never experience this.  Ever. Until I tried being nice.  This means one of two things.  Either girls are evil or I have a little gremlin that lives under my bed who shoots lightning at every girl I talk to immediately after she promises to call me back.  My money's on the first one, because I'd have smelled the gremlin by now.

Conclusion - Girls are evil and "nice guys" just serve as a way to exact some sordid, vicarious revenge on the asshole guys who've blown the girl off in the past.

So, given the circumstances, and my experiences, I'm left to conclude that being a nice guy really DOES mean you finish last.  I suspected this, but now I've experienced it and can confirm it for certain.  Girls do not want "a decent guy".  They want a guy who will treat them as the inferior lifeforms that they (with a few notable exceptions, you know who you are) for some reason feel they are.  Final Conclusion - When a girl says "I just want to find a nice guy to treat me the way I should be treated", what she's REALLY saying is "I can't wait to find another shit-headed, self-serving guy who sees me as a walking penis-hole and treats me as such, thereby giving me absolutely no respect whatsoever unless I manage to somehow grovel before him long enough that he decides it wouldn't harm his dignity or self-image to bestow just a wee bit upon me".  Luckily, I was born that guy, and that guy I shall remain.  Being nice sucks.  It's stupid and leads to me getting owned.  Fuck that.  Fuck.  That.

Disclaimer - I'm sure not every girl fits into this stereotype, as I know a few here and there who don't myself.  I think that those girls are well aware they fall outside the spectrum of normality, however.  For the vast majority of girls, this description is dead-on.  I encourage those girls to give up the whole "I just want a nice guy" bullshit and voice your true feelings.  We're onto you now, and we know that line's just a cliche pile of shit almost on par with "I'll call you right back".

Death.

Sādhogopāl Rām: Nothing changes anything like death! And though death of a close one hurts the worst but it brings the person, who lost a close one, face to face with himself & the way his life is going to unfold from that moment on. He recognizes that self within which eventually inspires him to claim what he otherwise would've never... even dared to think.

I guess that’s the reason why the saying exist-Death is Beautiful!

Sourav C. Pandey: Death scares me! It's only weeks, someone really close to me died! Death is NOT BEAUTIFUL AT ALL! It's the end. And I don't like them!

Sādhogopāl Rām: ‎Well, Brother.. no body likes death, not even me.. and death is indeed scary and it also the end.. But, what I meant here is the afterlife which starts when you lose someone close to you.

Sourav C. Pandey: How do you know the afterlife .. read it in books, silly hollywood or bollywood movies, that thing called god enlightened you .. no! no! no! Nothing related to death can ever be nice. I wish death DIES!

Sādhogopāl Rām: Come on, Bro. you don't need to be so cynical..and besides what you are talking is just childish. Death, no matter how painful, is the ultimate truth.
And no one escapes the cold cuddle of truth, no one.
Oh.. about afterlife.. no, i did not read it in books, silly hollywood or bollywood movies.. and No, God certainly did not enlighten me.. as its me who is expressing his own thoughts and feelings.
Tell me, do you stop living when a close relative dies?,.No, You start fresh, you take new steps.. remembering them in each one of them.. and taking courage from it.. inspiring yourself so that... when You finally start living.. you know, you feel.. that .. that someone is now smiling upon you for not giving up.

Sagar Bhanushali: Death can b termed as a later phase of life...nd a ultimate truth...

Sourav C. Pandey: Friend, not all truth are always likable. And you know childish thoughts are the purest and most honest thoughts, when one talks childish, he/she talks good.
See even you agree, COLD cuddle of truth, we HAVE to submit to it, tell me WHO wants to see their LOVED ones die?
We don't start afresh, we HAVE to, we don't stop living; we HAVE to live for the ones who love us; I really wish I could see them smile each infront of me, and don't have to live on IMAGINATIONS!
You know Sadh, due to some unavoidable reasons, I have to watch a post-mortem right infront of my eyes, the one Uncle who always taught me about behaving with humans, was treated like an object! you tell me what was NICE about that or his death at all?

If death had to be termed as a later phase of life, it wouldn't have termed death et al!

Sādhogopāl Rām: Man, I've no words, justification or for that matter argument to offer to your reply above.
I'm sorry for your uncle's death, I really am..but except my condolences there's nothing I can give you.. May be, after years and years of life living.. when you think about what we talked today.. you might realize what I meant.
And one thing, when childs talk or someone talks childishly.. they ain't honest.. they are naive.. they no nothing about life or for that matter death.
Anyways, brother.. its useless to stretch this thing over such issue. SO i would request you to please.. At Peace, brother, at peace!

Sourav C. Pandey: Dude that's fine. It was not an argument for me, just an expression. :)
And you are right, we don't always get what we want .. the truth!
Thank God I'm naive; and I'm just learning myself what the real world is like. I'm glad I could wait this long before I had to deal with reality. :)

Do not get wrong opinions, this is a chat, me and my friends had over a Facebook wall discussion, and these are general opinions, not some heated up arguments. I wanted to have some more opinions, so I just copy and posted the exact words over here. Sadhogopal Ram is one of the finest blogger I know, you can catch him blogging at - This is ARTH about everything.

PS: I am fine, but at times we need expressing our emotion and sharing them too. I know this must not have been a happy read, considering my WORST stupidity, ohh and for those who don’t know me or want to offer me some challenging new job, may read my Curriculum-Vitae ! :P :)

OFF TOPIC UPDATE – My indiblogger friends should read and let me know their opinions on this topic I posted - Too many blogging networks; a bliss or a headache? Blogging identities!

Wish

I wish I was Peter Pan,

And I would never grow up.
Flying high above it all in the sky,
My only problem Captain Hook.

I wish I was Dr. Who,
And I could go back in time.
Go back and put things right,
Make it better in this hell of yours and mine.

I wish I was a professional actor,
And I got paid to act someone I’m not.
Get paid to fake who I am,
The real me would be forgot.

I wish I was a little kid,
Who could be held in their parent’s arms.
Gullible enough to believe that everything’s going to be alright,
Nothing’s of any harm.

I wish I could do magic
And it was as simple as waving my wand to put things right.
Instead it’s me fighting,
With all of my god-damned fight.

I wish I was a shooting star
And I came from a galaxy afar.
Then people could wish upon me and I could make their dreams come true.
A wish upon a star.

My wishes are small and few.

I wish my wishes get true!